So its been over six months since my last six month update. It’s not that I intentionally neglect this blog, but more that life moves on and I struggle to catch up.
Well my father passed away in May. It was expected. He had been dying for a year and half and we all knew it was coming. He was skinny again, way too skinny. He was weak and I think hiding and lot of the pain he was going through. He passed away May 5. Ironically, my racist father passed away on a Mexican holiday. There are sometimes when it hurts to breathe. Although I am 28 and have been totally on my own for ten years, a little girl always needs her dad. I guess part of the hurt was also in realizing that I am alone now. There are no makers of Mandie left. No moms or dads or grands, just me.
It also seems that my dad gave me one last parting gift. I had actually anticipated this but the fact that it really happened did surprise me. Despite the fact that I didn’t ovulate, well at least I never had a temp spike, and despite the fact that I had no normal periods since Riley was born, I got pregnant. In my family we joke that my dad is our fertility god. Since I became an adult, visiting my father alone has always gone hand and hand to being pregnant. All of our pregnancies including the miscarriages happened either right before visiting my dad or right after returning from a visit. Well this time I went to say goodbye to him the beginning of May and ended up pregnant that same month. So yes the Phillips family is expecting number five. And yes we do already have a baby. Riley turned one the day we found out. And yes I am 90 percent sure it is another boy. Scary and crazy yes, but there you go. The update.